Saturday, November 29, 2014

Parties and chocolate

So today a friend of mine decided to throw a party
You might think "oh cool, a party, I bet you had fun then" (believe me I know you don't) noooooooooooo. Parties are the perfect way to make someone have second thoughts about suicide.
I mean think about it. First of all you need to decide what to wear. Do you want to be the absolute perfect looking person or the idgaf person with the moschino jeans? Do you want to be the drunk one at the party, you know the one that always gets too drunk or the chocolate is life chocolate is love person? You see my problem? And I'm not even a girl! You see I'm one of those people who don't do anything till the last second so I somehow managed to get myself to the party and because my life manages to to be perfect everyday I needed to ignore someone today at the party you know some boy drama! (Don't even...) so me and my friends decided to go out and jump on the trampoline outside the house you know like all the cool kids! But because we are talking about me, some kids were sitting on the trampoline talking about the meaning of life. Don't get me wrong I'm usually into this stuff but today I just wanted to have a little bit fun ok? I mean seriously
I don't want to know how long the tongue of your boyfriend is when I can be jumping on a trampoline like Leonardo Dicaprio trying to get an Oscar!
Oh well I somehow survived the party and I wasn't the chocolate is life chocolate is love person at the party! I swear!

Stay classy

Monday, November 24, 2014

Being in a relationship vs being single

I kinda have the feeling that these days people think being in a relationship makes you look cooler. People think being in a relationship is a good thing. 
They somehow think being single is a bad thing and every person who is in a relationship kinda rubs it into your face when you're single now I am here as a single man to tell you it's actually wonderful to be single! Don't get me wrong there is nothing wrong with being in a relationship but being single is way more relaxing and easier.
Now first of all you have your freedom, not just the freedom of trying your cheesy pick up lines on other people but also the freedom of doing every nerdy thing you want to do. We all have a nerdy side and sometimes you have to hide it when you're in a relationship I mean seriously, which one of you plays League of Legends with his girlfriend? (If you do then congratulations you have found the perfect girl) but you can let all the crapy and freaky side out when you're single because there is no one else there to judge you. And being in a relationship is hard work for your brain! You have to remember everything, literally everything! But for some reason everybody wants to make being single a bad thing. So for all you single people out there, I am standing for you and I'm telling you... Who are we kidding, being single sucks even more than you think!

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Lazy Saturdays

Ohhhh lazy Saturdays.
You have no idea how much I love lazy Saturdays. Lazy Saturdays are like drinking a frappuccino while watching the New Year's Eve fireworks on the top of the Empire State Building, they are like waking up at 7 am and realizing it's weekend, they are like finally founding the answer of why so many people don't know the difference between your and you're. But there is a little thing missing this Saturday. Just 4 letters but it's ruining my life and that is Wifi! And suddenly your frappuccino is poisoned. It's Monday and you're late for school and your also one of those people who don't know the difference between you're and your.
You see my friends, lazy Saturdays need some particular activities to become lazy Saturdays like watching Netflix, drinking hot tea while watching Netflix and cuddling while drinking a cup of tea and watching Netflix (haha no not cuddling. Shoutout to all you single people out there like myself... Stay strong) and you certainly can't have a lazy Saturday when you don't have wifi. So thank you internet for giving us a life and then ruining it. We all love you.

Keep it classy